Audreyisms & Maddieisms

I realized I hadn't posted any Audreyisms or Maddieisms in a while, so it is time.  I know I've talked about a few individually as they happened, but here's a review for you.  ;)  Straight from the mouths of babes!

Maddie, Age 3

She commonly refers to curtains as "gates".

“Audrey, you are SO cute!”

“Mommy, read me a story with your mouth.  Say, ‘Once upon a time’.”

So Maddie was in time out when I picked her up from preschool today.  She had thrown her bear across the room during nap time (among other things).  When Daddy asked her during dinner conversation why she threw it - she replied, "I wanted to see him fly".  =)  (Why else would one want to throw a stuffed animal across the room, right?)

 

Maddie was having a difficult time staying in bed one night.  Mommy put her back in bed.  She got out.  Daddy put her back in bed.  She got out.  So, the last time Daddy went in there he said, “Maddie, if you get out of bed again you have to get a spanking.  Do you hear me?”  She whispered, “I’m sleeping.”  (Seriously, how cute is that?!)

She wanted to get out the Clorox wipes and her Nana told her no.  She said, "It's ok.  My mommy lets me play with chemicals."  Ha!!

Audrey, Age 5

“What’s up with that outfit?  Your head looks like a lollipop and your body like the stick.” (She's just keeping it real!)

“Daddelyn McCrae Norton” (That would be a combination of her sister's name and Daddy.)

“I want the freedom to choose what I eat for supper.  Yeah, we learned about freedom today.” (And, she lost it with that comment!)

“He said the really bad ‘S’ word.  He said “stupid” and then Maddie said it.  I didn’t remember what a bad boy he was.  He needs to change his attitude.”  (Tread lightly around her, friends.)

Audrey saw two guys smoking outside and freaked out, "Mom!! Those boys are smoking. They're either going to die or get 'Hair Cancer'!" She was very concerned.

She had a small scratch on her face and she said, “It looks like  I was in war and got shot doesn’t it?”  (Overly dramatic much?)

“Quiet, my leg is asleep.” (Hystarical!)

“Look, it’s a particle potty.” (She tends to mix her up words on occasion.)

“I don’t remember.  Snuffy, my brain pet, makes me forget.  He plugs into my brain.  I have to wake her up.”  “Mom, you need a brain pet.”  “Audrey, how do you get one?”  “Use your imagination.”

We were reading our fortunes from our cookies at dinner.  Audrey turned hers over and read off all the numbers.  She said, “These are my lucky numbers”.  Derek said, “How do you know”?  She replied very matter of fact, “It’s ON the fortune.”