Overextended. Blessed. Frumpy. Excited. Disappointed. Loved. Refreshed.
Am I a crazy mess or what?! I've been a roller coaster of emotions this week. I've sat down to blog a couple of times this week and just didn't know where to start. Nothing specifically has happened, just a hodge podge mess of a schedule. Remember, one of my resolutions was BALANCE and a will to say NO? I haven't taken on anything new - and have no plans to do so, but the things that I was already committed to have revved back up and I'm having a hard time keeping my head above water. Yes, I realize I do this to myself, but I'm a work in progress. I'm still learning....
Overextended. Ever feel like you're being pulled in so many directions that you don't even know where you are? That has certainly been me this week. I've been trying to play catch up from the week off of snow. Work is a little more demanding. I've been bringing home a lot of work (which I'm grateful for). But, since I am the only one working for him now - if I don't do it, it doesn't get done. I feel a lot of pressure in that regards. On top of my "day job", I have a paid choreography gig. It doesn't seem to be coming together as I'd hoped and is taking a bit longer to get through. Again, feeling pressure to please and there's a time line pushing me. I think just having a creative type job adds another level of pressure. Additionally, there is a volunteer choreography gig I committed to some time ago that starts tomorrow. It should be a lot of fun, but is another sacrifice of time. Thankfully, Audrey is involved, so it is something we can do together.
Blessed. Through all the chaos, I do not lose sight of the blessings. I love my family so much! My girls are amazing - and so is that wonderful man I married. ;) I have been greatly blessed with some wonderful new friendships. God is so good! He has surrounded me with some amazing people and I can't wait to see what He has in store!
Frumpy. Gotta balance the good with the bad.... I've got that old frumpy feeling back. I really, truly want to get back to working out again. I miss it. My body misses it. My clothes are tight. I feel sluggish. I don't like looking in the mirror. My second chin is back. Stinks!
Excited. I guess this really goes hand in hand with the Blessed. God has temporarily opened a door for me to fill in with an incredible vocal group - which has resulted in some beautiful friendships. I absolutely love singing with these talented ladies and am completely honored to be a part of it, even if only for a short time.
Disappointed. Audrey asked me tonight what the "F word" was. It breaks my heart to the core. I am so glad she is open and talks with me about things she hears at school. But, I want her home. I want to teach her the right ways. I don't want to control her, but I do want to control her environment right now. I need to better equip her for this crazy world. I can do it.
Loved. I am loved. My children love me. My husband loves me. Even when I mess up. When I can't balance everything. When the dishes aren't done, laundry is piled up, and floors are gross. I am still loved. My heavenly father loves me unconditionally. Through all things, I am loved.
Refreshed. Amazing what a new haircut will do for a girl! Such a refreshing feeling. Kinda reminds me of a new year. A new start. Does that sound silly? I love the excitement of starting something new. We've started a new study on Sunday nights about the Attributes of God. And, we're 4 lessons into our Revelation study with Beth Moore. I'm also reading through the Bible. I feel this excitement and joy that I haven't felt in a long time. I just can't get enough! I'm learning things and seeing things in a light. It's exciting and I can't wait to share all that God reveals in the days to come.